"She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future."
Strength in Brokenness
I believe in the the power of prayer,
the strength found in brokenness,
the peace found in suffering,
the calm that comes from knowing we are not alone,
the peace that comes from knowing that it all has purpose,
the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirt,
But perfection does not exist.
I believe in imperfection,
in the freedom to fail,
and the arms that will pick you back up again,
Grace, Mercy, Hope.
Nothing I do can make Him love me more or love me less.
My Personal Credo
"She is clothed with strength and dignity, and laughs without fear of the future," Psalm 31:25. The first time I read these words I was automatically envious. I in no way or form could laugh without fear at the future; instead, I was living in fear of it. Afraid to take the wrong turn, open the wrong door, make the wrong choice. Yet, the words spoke to me. I imagined what it would feel like to be so confident in Christ that you could laugh at the idea of the future rather than cower in front of it. I didn't understand how this could happen, but I desired to be so content and confident in my place in Christ that this verse could be used to describe me.
Flash forward several years to Preview Weekend, a conference held for people involved in campus ministry through Cru. I sat listening to Roger Hershey talk about God's will. He spoke of not living in fear of the future but believing and trusting that God was faithful enough to guide our steps and gracious enough to cover our mistakes. Those words really hit me. Nothing was to big for God. No decision. No mistake. I could trust that he had a plan and all I had to do was step out in faith not knowing what that plan was or how he would accomplish it.
It didn't happen over night, but eventually I really believed these words. I couldn't miss God's plan for my life if I was faithfully following him. I couldn't stand still for fear of messing up or I would never move. I had to trust in God. I had to trust that no matter what he was covering my path and all the mistakes that may follow. As soon as I believed this, I went from living in fear of my mistakes, of missed chances, of screwed up opportunities to laughing with joy without fear of the future. God was big enough, and I could boldly and confidently find joy in Him.