Peer Revising and Editing

We underlined dialog, dialog tags, transitional words, climax-where the main character changes. Our peers commented on character, setting, stages of plot, conflict.

Positives to peer editing are getting a look at your story in a different perspective and editing it in that way. Negatives to this are getting bad advice back when you need it.

Parker Alford

Mrs. Johnson

Language Arts


Dark House

It was a cold, dark day. Everyone was indoors waiting for the sun to come out, everyone except the new neighbors. They seemed strange to everyone, even acting like they were paranormal. You could always here someone yelling, “Help! They’re coming for me!” Every day stranger things would happen, once someone saw a random jar of pickles fly out of their window and crash onto the ground. The mailman, Francesco, never knew anything about this house. He just dropped off the mail.

Some fellow neighborhood friends called the police for “Unusual activity”, but the police couldn’t find anything. Everyone was 24/7 watching that one house for any proof of something paranormal. Their yard is as dead as dinosaurs; the house looks like it’s about collapse any moment. This time when Francesco came by, he was curious; he wanted to know what was going on. So that’s exactly what he did.

When Francesco was right about to knock on the door, he felt something rumble, it got stronger and louder. Until you could hear someone scream, “Earthquake!” But this was no earthquake, smoke was leaking from the ground, fire started to show. This was all around the strange house, and Francesco. The mailman didn’t know what to do, until he realized he was trapped. The house started shooting up in the sky like a rocket ship.

Now Francesco had no choice whether to die by running out of oxygen or by these strange creatures. So he tried to stop them. He took a meat cleaver from the kitchen and headed upstairs. There was one room with the light on, so with great caution he opened the door and sure enough, there were three little purple figures staring at him. But no one moved, until the aliens started to talk.

Turns out Francesco was safe because the aliens were actually friendly. They just happened to crash land on earth. This was the only way they could get back to their planet. So they dropped Francesco back home and left for good. This was the first and only sighting of aliens, and Francesco told no one about it.

Parker Alford, Xander Brown, Jayden Santos

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