Ancient Egypt!

Going back to the past!!! at 1080p


Prepare yourself for a blast to the past! Next stop, Ancient Egypt! We'll be using you subj- patie- lab ra- vacationers as our first persons to experience time travel! After this we'll like save JFK and stuff. But for now, our number one priority is to make sure that nobody is hurt, because the visitor is always important! (Warning: any alteration in time will result in the possibility of death for the entire human race. Any paradoxes could have a ripple effect causing time itself to tear to shreds. Thank you for traveling with us!)

Costs and Expenses!

Now that all of that pesky warning stuff is out of the way let's move on to the cost. The investment I got from shark tank was only 4 dollars and it costed me 4.462 million dollars to perfe- to create the time travel device. So I put the cost at let's see, 3x the original cost.So about 13.386 million dollars. But it's worth the three day two night trip! Considering that you make it out without dy- I mean you'll be totally fine.

Ancient Egyptian currency looks like this, the weight would be the value of the coin

Map of Ancient Egypt!

Now here is a map of Ancient Egypt to make sure you can navigate your way through ancient Egypt. You can visit Upper Egypt which is actually south of Lower Egypt! Also you can see the mountains covered in a fresh grove of lush, green trees. Watch the beautiful Nile River that flows from south to north! Also use it for transportation in Ancient Egyptian boats called feluccas. Feeling tired from doing all that paddling up-hill? Want to take a break but you're on an important trade mission for the great pharaoh Hatshepsut? Well, then stop at the cataracts and buy some mementos for your trip!

Now if you stay at Giza then you can visit the ancient pyramids!

All about the camel!

These magnificent creatures despite having hairy and blocked ears have excellent hearing. That will guarantee that you won't lose him/her! And I can't forget that their life span is up to 45 years so if the machine somehow fails, (which I highly doubt) you won't be stuck alone without a ride! Also they're the only way to get around in the desert for many obvious reasons. One being they can store water in their humps. Camels have two rows of eyelashes too which make them the perfect animal for getting around in the dry, sandy, desert!

And if you visit on a Wednesday than you can rent a camel FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

The Camel Cove cabin! Sponsored by Jordan Freewoman!!

Have a nice stay at the Camel Cove Cabin which is a motel that is located in Giza by the Great Pyramid, built by the great Pharaoh Khufu. And see the beautiful topography of the land not far from the Camel Cove Cabin! Mountains, valleys, deserts, plains, and hills are all accessible and a beautiful sight. And on Wednesday you can stay 25% off for a three day two night trip

I know what you're thinking, but no, this is not Morgan Freeman. This is Jordan Freewoman. There's a difference.
For all your necessities and other desires!

What to Pack!

You will need to pack many items such as clothes made from linen wraps, perfume made from flowers and scented wood, and mirrors of polished silver/copper. Also, children are the heart of the family so for the kiddies it's only 6.693 million dollars, half of the price of an adult's ticket! Also you might want to pack an mp3 player to blend in with all of the Ancient Egyptians jamming out to "Fall Out Boy!" actually probably not, they'd probably be listening to some instruments related to the harp or flute like instraments being played. No guitars or drums.

This is the magical suitcase that allows traveling through time! I call it the suit case thingy. It's a work in progress.

Pharaohs, Religion, Mummies, and Pyramids!

You can visit the tombs of Pharaohs and try to bypass the traps like falling rocks and false floors to get to their treasure! I wouldn't highly advise that though, those Egyptians were pretty clever people. Also you can offer bread to the statues of the gods in the temples and chapels. Not in person, though, for only Priests, Pharaohs, and Kings were allowed inside those temples. You can also visit the Great Pyramid built by Khufu with over two million stone blocks, still being a mystery to how it was built today! See the embalmers with an Anubis mask on work on the bodies of important people to create a spooky mummy!

OOOOOH SPOOOOKY!!! Mummies weren't really spooky, that's a common misconception.
The "Great Pyramid" is truly a magnificence!

The Goddess Grill

At The Goddess Grill enjoy plenty of cultural food that is served to the pharaohs like Ramses II, Hatshepsut, and even Khufu!  Here is a menu to give you a little taste of what they have!

Bread & Butter........................................Free With Meal

Fresh Brewed Barley Beer.....................................$4.99

Fruit Salad..................................................$1.95

Veggie Burgers..............................................$6.50

Roasted Lamb................................................$10.99

Grilled Goat................................................$9.50

That's just a sample of the glorious grub at the Goddess Grill. It is located in Cairo, which is the present day capital of Egypt.

This is the Ancient Egyptian goddess of protection, Isis. She would protect those who desperately need it.

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