Amazing Abundance of Hosts in France!

No Admission Fee!


Have you been looking for that one of a kind vacation resort? Well look no further! Here in France, you have hundreds of hosts to chose from, so hold back your parasitic needs no further!
These hosts here in France come by the dozen, sleep in filthy unsanitary trenches, and lack the ingenuity to properly find a way to rid of us! This one of a kind environment is not easy to come by, but today just happened to be your lucky day.

Things to be Aware of

• These hosts are already carrying multiple diseases and suffer from them such as the inflammation of the lining of the large intestines.
• Dead hosts are very often consumed by trench rats (who are also a very good host for body lice!).
Over 20,000 hosts suffer from trench foot (easier for us to attack the weak!).

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: My family of body lice has a few diseases, would we be still aloud to come for the sake of our survival?
A: Come one, come all! All diseases carried are welcome in the trenches of France, including epidemic typhus, trench fever, and epidemic relapsing fever!

Q: Can you guarantee our safety will be insured?
A: Alas, I can not. These hosts occasionally attempt various methods to rid of us, but thankfully rarely any achieve a gruesome outcome on our part. One method that seems to be highly effective is using a lighted candle to kill us - but those silly men require much more skill to effectively rid someone of us without burning their clothes.

Q: Are we the only parasites that will have a stay in this wonderland?
A: Indeed you will but with one more companion - the trench rat.

Q: My wife is pregnant, would this be an ideal environment to lay our children?
A: Why indeed it is! She can have her eggs on the hosts clothes, and the soldier's body heat will hatch them between two to three hours!

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