The National Mooncolonyvillepopsicle Crisis

by Kyle Duerr (Graph 7)

Once upon a time, there was a small colony on the moon called Mooncolonyville. After many years of exploration, it was discovered that there was a certain substance under the surface of the moon that could make a Popsicle taste amazing. There was not a single Popsicle elsewhere that tasted within anywhere close of being even half as flavorful as this Mooncolonyvillepopsicle™, as it was called. After this happened, the Mooncolonyvillepopsicle™ company was founded. Before then, there was never a Mooncolonyvillepopsicle™ created so they started from scratch. The Mooncolonyvillians began producing Mooncolonyvillepopsicles™ at a pace of about a billion Popsicles a day for one day.  Once they reached a trillion Mooncolonyvillepopsicles™, they began to sell them in stores in America. Immediately they were a craze. They were bought at a pace of about 60 million popsicles a day, and within 1.5 days there were only about ten million left. The only reason people stopped buying Mooncolonyvillepopsicles™ was because it was found that there was a chemical in these popsicles that could make you very sick and possibly kill you. The remaining popsicles were left alone at ten million in number for two whole days until the Mooncolonyvillians were arrested for treason. This marked the end of a 4.5 day long buying frenzy (mainly among teens) and a potential national Popsicle-caused death epidemic throughout America.

Comment Stream