Come to Constantinople!
Ba, da, da, da, da, I'm loving God!
Constantinople is a beautiful place where you can worship God the right way! Some of you don't know the way, but that's no problem! Here's a map you can follow!
You don't want to go Rome, because they don't celebrate God the correct way! Come here, and we'll teach you how to pray, read the Bible.
We have a couple rules. Number One: NO PICTURES/ IDOLS OF GOD OR JESUS! Number Two: You can only be Orthodox Christian. Thank You, and have a nice day!